This is dedicated to Gaile in WA who wants a how to on buying CRISPY CATS.
Step 1 Congratulate yourself on having such great taste in candy bars. You are obviously a person with refined preferences.
Step 2 Figure out which of these fine retailers is closest to you.
-Country Village Nutrition in Longview
-Minkler's Green Earth in Renton
-Radiance Herbs and Massage in Olympia
-Sidecar on the AVE in Seattle
-Smart Nutrition in Turnwater
-Sunshine Nutrition in Kent
Step 3 Decided how to get to this fine retailer i.e Walk, run, ride a bike , ride a pony, take a hang glider, take a cab, hot wire your neighbors car, hitchhike or bum a ride.
Step 4 Go into the store and ask where the CRISPY CATS are located and when they show you make a huge fuss. Act really excited and tell the clerk that you love CRISPY CATS and that you love him/her. Some people like to add a hand clapping jumping up and down thing. I prefer to take a flying leap at the clerk, throw myself onto them and give them a big hug.
Step 5 Either pay the suggested retail price or scream " LOOK, IT"S (insert name of rock star)" and make a break for it. You may want to asses the situation to see which rock star the clerk might be excited to see.
In most health food stores a good " LOOK, IT"S JERRY GARCIA" should do the trick.
Step 6 Unwrap and enjoy, you earned it!
Don't forget you can always order from us direct!!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
2 comments:
yo. garcia's dead. i know a lot of health food store employees are stoned and generally spacey to begin with, (trust me, i was a stoned spacey helath food store employee for years) but most of them at this point will not be fooled by the ol' "look, its jerry" trick. (again, trust me, i tried it when attempting to steal the giant water filtration unit from earth fare). in any case, i would try perhaps michael franti or ani difranco.
Hurray! I will be in Seattle this weekend - and I definitely think I can pull off #4! If I can maintain my composure long enough to get my partner in crime to snap a photo of me enacting #4, I will post it on my blog for you ;-) Thanks a billion! Looooooooooooove me some Crispy Cats!!
Post a Comment