Don't be a player hater.

This is war.

Just when you think it's safe........

Bottom line: I was tomato bombed! Yes, the master of tomato bombing had the tables turned on her and was bombed. The twist is that it's not who you think.

So there I was sitting and having a chat with Julie Schantz when I noticed a package on my desk. It was a small brown box with a label addressed to me, just sitting there looking so innocent and so full of the promise of gifts and treats awaiting me inside. Yet it was also a tad suspicious considering that there was no postage on it. hmmm....an inner office present??? I think an inner office grudge gift is more like it.

I asked Joel's daughter Molly if she saw any one near my desk. It seemed so odd that I was sitting at the conference table so nearby and didn't see the interloper. Molly said the only one she saw near my desk was The Fig. I wasn't surprised. So with caution and trepidation I opened the box. There were a zillion little peanut things, (so unfriendly towards our environment) and my hand keep roving through, searching for a treat until my finger had intercourse with something rather unfortunate...a nasty, moldy, stinky, floppy, rotten tomato.
OH NO HE DIDN'T!!!!!!!

Oh yes he did. I shrieked at the sight and smell of moldy 'maters all over my fingers.
So I scooped it up and headed to the warehouse to do a little confronting. I saw my shot; I could have nailed his ass right there in the face with that mater', but I just couldn't do it. He was just moseying around, pretending not to know anything about the moldy 'mater and I just knew he would be a punk about it if I slammed a 'mater in his hair. He would get mad and then it really would be war. I then turned and looked at Eric. I could definitely feel OK throwing it on him, but he was already one step ahead of me and warned me not to do it because he was "wearing a baby blue shirt." That's what he said!!!! A baby blue shirt!!!!! On principal alone I should have then thrown it on him.

In the end I went outside and hurled it on the dumpster and watched it explode. It was a little anti-climactic to say the least. I do find it interesting however, that The Fig would waste food, considering I was harshly chided for basically taking food out of some gutter punk squatter kid's mouth with all my waste the week before.
I guess that's why they say *all is fair in love and war*.