This is an instructional installment on how to make a big deal out of nothing.
*individual results may vary
First you wait until you are in a bad mood about something that you have no control over. Make sure that what ever is pissing you off is nothing like what you choose to make a big deal over.
Then you have to wait until the opportunity arises for you to start making your stink. A suggestion is to pick something that has a shread of validity, just enough so it's not obvious what you are really doing. It's important to remember that you are risking looking like a total ass so it is best to be sure before you start in. You also run the risk of being called out on it in a public forum so proceed with caution.
Once you know that you are ready to make a big deal out of nothing start slowly. Keep accelerating with hypothetical situations and what ifs. Make sure that the volume of your voice keeps getting louder. This is especially true if you are in a public place and are with people who embarrasses easily.
The next step is to start taking everything personally. Make exaggerated hand gestures and and wave your arms around. You can even mention that your personal rights are being infringed upon. Make sure to mention that no one understands you.
None of this needs to make sense or pertain to the conversation. Don't forget, you are making a big deal out of nothing. Using fowl language and pointing in peoples faces is also effective.
You can drag this out as long as you want, and when you feel you have sufficiently made a big deal out of nothing you can simply end it.
One method of termination is to shout a few insults and run out in a huff slamming the door behind you.
Another popular method is to insult someones mom, and then run out in a huff slamming the door.
You can also break down in tears and sob on the floor while everyone stands around feeling uncomfortable.
No matter what you do your sure to make a point.
If you found this information helpful or you have a success story you want to share with us we would love to know about it.
Good Luck!!!!
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4 comments:
i am so sick of that stupid balloon hanging around in our offices. god!! i think i may hafta quit. this is b.s. that thing just floats there with its annoying little graphic staring at me every time i go to pee. its super annoyi9ng. GOD!! why don't they just throw it away?? IT LOOKS SO TACKY JUST SITTING THERE. ITS DRIVING ME NUTS!! AAAAAAAAAAAH! I MUST NOW BREAK SOMETHING! ^#$#$&!!
Hello Annie Bannani (Is it ok to call you that? I guess I should have asked in person or over the phone before calling you that on the blog, huh?) I just wanted to let you know that your blogs are now the highlight of my life (or at least will be after I see the Smashing Pumpkins tonight as that is currently the highlight of my life). Don't you think it would be a good idea to hand-bind your blogs into a limited edition tome of hilarity? I do. Anywho, now that I know how you love rats, I will have a rat-loving related gift for you the next time we meet. And, in case you are wondering, this gift will not be something that is actually yours that I am returning in a clever way. Much love.
I tend in life to go through periods (that is most of the time) where I make a big deal out of all "the things that I do wrong" (that is every little thing that I do).
"I hurt her!" "I didnt kiss her!" "I'm afraid to commit!" "I was afraid to commit!" "What am I doing in a job that I hate!!! I gotta quit!!" "Why did I quit the job!!!"
It's funny how this tends to feed itself. Making a big deal and torturing yourself makes you take irrational, quick, decisions, loose direction (not that I had one to start with), miss the good things in life, be gloomy, which puts you in an even more fatalistic mood... You think that you're unhappy because you did wrong choices, and as a result you even worry more about choices and do a bigger deal out of them and be more unhappy lol...
I dont know what it takes to snap out of it... maybe to loose the one you love the most, so as to put things in perspective... Hit the bottom... or maybe an antidepressant cure...
You have to learn to let go...
:)
It took me hitting the bottom... loosing the best job that I ever had and the most fun and loving girl that I ever had (because I was so worried about loosing them)... to realise that I was making a big deal out of nothing.
The bottom doesnt feel so bad. Sure, I miss the person that I was before, but was it really worth it to worry so much... definitely not.
Sad how life has a way of showing you the solution only after the problem has passed. I should have taken the advice that was given to me.
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