Tuesday, September 18, 2007

Line hijinks

Recently Mary told me about an experience she had in a local coffee shop, it was horrifying.

Whilst waiting in line , a practice that Mary hates, she learned something new.



A small girl was thirsty and wanting her mother to buy her a bottle of water. The little girl said "Mommy, I want a bottle of water" and the mommy said " Oh, you mean earth juice? You want mommy to get you a bottle of earth juice?" Mary was aghast. The incident was described as embarrassing and uncomfortable, and what falls into the category, according to Mary as line hijinkss. I was intrigued, what I wondered is line hijinkss? Line hijinkss are all the things that people do while waiting in line that are inconvenient and/or annoying and obnoxious to others. I have been guilty of line hijinks many, many times. Some of my biggest offenses have been....




  • Paying for things in change and taking a long time to count my pennies

  • Spacing out on a long line instead of figuring out what I want to order and then debating out loud what I should get.

  • Having a tickle fight with Teddydigital and encroaching on the space of others.

  • Dropping my bag and having the contents spill all over the floor, usually reveling personal items that make others uncomfortable; such as but not limited too, pamphlets on chronic constipation and personal lubricants

  • Starting up conversations with strangers just to pass time, usually when its obviously they don't want to forge a new friendship.

Those are the line hijinks's I have been guilty of and will admit to. One line hijink that is totally unforgivable is the person that stands in a line and just farts. Just farts and acts like they have no idea that a horrible smell is invading everyones face and making them want to simultaneously puke and punch someone.

If you have other forms of line hijinks that you would like to contribute please let me know.


1 comment:

Stu Helm said...

Mary certainly must be guilty of some Hijinxs'sss herself, since she is well known far and wide as dirty fart knocker!