Monday, September 17, 2007

Please read if you are a squirrel and/or operate a moter veichel

Lately I have seen way to many squirrels run over on the road. Not just a few, but a ton! I counted 8 on 240, I was horrified. We need a better plan, a better way of co-existing with the squires, we need to stop running them over with our cars. And the squirrels need to do their part as well, that is why I am doing a how to for squirrels and for the operators of moter vehicles pass this along.


This part is for the squirrels......

We all need to do our part in road safety, even you squirrels. Yes you're cute and fuzzy and funny to watch but there is nothing funny about how you cross the street. So I have outlined some safety tips that should help ensure that you live another day or at least a few more hours.

1. This is the simplest rule but most often the most forgotten LOOK BOTH WAYS BEFORE YOU CROSS. I see squirrels just running all willy nilly into the street and then trying to abort the mission when cars are racing towards them bring me to #2

2. Once you have made the decision to cross, stick with it and follow Thu until completion. After you have looked both ways and seen that the coast is clear just go for it. Thus avoiding all the zig zaging all over the place and we all know what zig zaging leads to.

3. Don't try to cross to a place that is uncrossable. Meaning if you see that on I-240 w there is a huge concrete divider that is 4 feet high and you have to run and then leap on to it to avoid the rush hour traffic then be smart and don't do it.

4. Most importantly use your tiny head. Being cute can get you only so far in this world. I have done 2 squirrel rescue missions because of flippant road crossing antics. All accidents that could have been avoided. By the way I was not the one that injured the squires with my car I was the one that witnessed the crime and then intervened and took the squirrel with the broken leg to Dr. Pablo's office.


This is for the operators of motor vehicle

1. Stop being so selfish and thinking that animals have no business in the road. We have invaded their would and put are cars and roads and bulls*#@t in their home and then we run
them over.

2. Pay attention when you see an animal lingering on the side of the road, squires are impulsive and make rash choices they are known for racing out, its your job to notice and slow down.

3. If you do hit a squirrel with your car then you need to get out and check to see if you need to take him/her to the vet. Don't be so cheep, its your fault for being a part of the most greedy species of animals on the planet, totally encroaching on all other animals territory and then coping an attitude when inconvenienced by other beings.

4. Be nice and toss nuts out your car window in heavily populated squirrel areas. its the least you can do.

1 comment:

Kelly J. Tokasz said...

I have a squirrel story that fits perfectly with this squirrel-related blog. Recently, on a quiet, sunny, Sunday afternoon, I was sitting on my front stoop talking to my mother and watching the traffic on our highly traveled road drive by way too fast. There is a little grove of pine trees across the street where squirrels like to hang out and chase each other in hormone-fueled frenzy. I watched in horror as such an interaction took place and the aggressive male squirrel chased the visibly frightened female squirrel into the road just as a white VW bus drove by to hit the poor thing without slowing down at all. I felt as though I may cry or throw up or both as the squirrel had a sort of seizure before laying still on its back, cute little legs in the air. I couldn't bare the thought of another ruthless driver coming along to smoosh the squirrel so I went in search or a shovel or other implement to move it off the road to rest in a soft bed of pine needles at the base of a tree. My search took a little while and I eventually returned with a plastic grocery bag to cover my hands. When I got back, the squirrel was not only alive, it had rolled back over and was walking around. By around, I actually mean a round because it was running in circles. I decided that the best way to save the squirrel was to chase it off the road. I chased it in circles a few times before it figure out how to run in a straight line again and scampered back to its little pine tree haven. So, I now have a theory that many squirrel deaths could be prevented it the squirrel would get up after the first car hits them, instead of playing dead, so that the second and third cars don't kill them.